Being a business owner or industry leader is extremely challenging at the best of times. It can feel like as soon as you’ve overcome an obstacle, there’s another just around the corner. But as the saying goes “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”, and that’s exactly how successful people view adversity.
They don’t give up when adversity strikes, but see it as a learning experience to help them grow. Figuring out how to overcome challenges and adversity in your life, is actually pivotal to your future success.
So when life knocks you down, ask yourself these 3 questions and find the strength lift yourself up again.
1. What can this experience teach me?
All the wisest and strongest leaders know that challenges are valuable teaching moments. No matter how difficult or painful an experience, you can convert it into personal value. The fact that you’re in pain is a sure sign itself that you’re going through a growth phase, after all “no pain, no gain”.
Realise that pain is a temporary condition and that it is giving you an opportunity to learn. Dig deeper into the situation and try to see it objectively without self-pity or anger. Ask yourself how the situation happened and what part you may have played it, perhaps no part at all. Could you have done anything differently and what would you do next time?
2. What choices do I have?
Sometimes when you’re faced with a particularly difficult challenge, it can be hard to see what path you should take. But remind yourself that there is always more than one choice, and that you’re not trapped by your circumstances.
People that are truly resilient remind themselves of this fact constantly when faced with adversity. They look at the real options available and ask questions rather than being stuck in a quagmire of fear, such as:
• What outcome do I most want to happen?
• What other outcomes might be good too?
• What obstacles are preventing these outcomes?
• Are there people I know who have overcome similar obstacles?
Often if you don’t know what to do, it’s better to try something and fail your way towards the right outcome, learning all the way, rather than just doing nothing.
3. What’s humorous about this experience?
“If I wasn’t laughing I’d be crying” is something that people say all the time. This is because really you have no control over what life is going to throw at you next. You can choose to look at an experience through the lens of misery or you can choose to view it with humour. Looking at the funny side of things can help you step back from a situation and think more creatively to solve it.
Not taking the problem too seriously is also a way of not being drawn into negative self-talk which isn’t helpful or useful when you’re needing solutions and possibilities. Try and focus on all the good things you’ve done, rather than give into the fear about one thing that’s gone wrong.
Final thoughts...
Being able to see adversity as part of your growth and development process is an important skill. In our society failure is not a part of our mindset, and we can be so afraid of failing that we don’t act as boldly as we should. But acting boldly is necessary if you want to achieve big goals, and the occasional setback is normal and should be embraced as a chance to learn and grow. Not doing so is the real mistake.